pramsay posted on September 18, 2007 13:25
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Information Omitted in the Eulogy
“How she brightened the home on Musgrave Blvd. She was the peacemaker in inter-sibling rivalries. The creative person on rainy days. The unbiased perspective when conflict arose. The winner of the Miss Congeniality Award. The loudest applause at her graduation. A loved volunteer at the Women’s Shelter and at the local food bank. She pushed the markers higher for the rest of us to strive for in the contest of life. Her race has been won.”
Typical words for a eulogy. Glowing and positive. But more often then not, some life details are omitted. Her three fines for driving recklessly. The time she verbally abused the cashier. The time she backed into a parked car but failed to report it. The two years she wouldn’t speak to her family after her mother died.
The Bible doesn’t tell us much about Miriam’s funeral. Maybe it was a State funeral with pomp and ceremony. Perhaps it was a private event. One thing was certain – she lived her life and now it was over.
Then came the children of Israel, even the whole congregation, into the desert of Zin in the first month: and the people abode in Kadesh;
and Miriam died there, and was buried there.
(Numbers 20:1)
Miriam was the astute older sister who stood at the banks of the River and watched over the little basket. She was the one who suggested to the Egyptian Princess she could find a caregiver for the infant. That wise and divinely appointed intervention spared baby Moses’ life from Pharaoh’s Nile Infanticide. Miriam was the one who led the choral/percussion ensemble in praising the Lord after crossing the Red Sea. She was a prophetess and a high profile person in the Exodus of the Children of Israel.
But there was a not-so-nice period in Miriam’s life when she harbored bitter thoughts towards the very brother she saved from the Nile. It’s one thing to heroically shine by helping someone in a crisis; but it requires a different set of inner attributes and graces to happily support the same person as you watch them get on their feet and far surpass you in influence and power. Moses was no longer the vulnerable baby in the Nile. He was God’s mighty leader of millions.
Miriam probably thought: “If it wasn’t for me, he wouldn’t even be around to do this work. Everybody thinks he’s so great. Where do I fit into this picture? Who does he think he is to grab all the power? He loves every minute of it. He loves the limelight. My brother Aaron and I– we do all the work leading this pack of people but Moses takes all the credit. We’re the brains behind it all. And besides, that woman he married. He definitely was in the wrong in marrying her. I think Aaron and I should go public against his choice of a wife.”
They did. On the surface the issue was the wife. But less then a centimeter below, jealousy was boiling. The real issue usually is not what it appears to be on the surface.
And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman.
And they said, Hath the LORD indeed spoken only by Moses? hath he not spoken also by us? And the LORD heard it.
(Numbers 12:1-2)
The Lord smote Miriam with leprosy. It was a very dark period in Miriam’s life. Whether all of that was skipped over in her funeral eulogy, we don’t know. But the fact remains, it was a part of her life history and she could not relive that segment of her life. She couldn’t undo what she had done. She couldn’t erase it from the memory of the people or expunge it from the record of Scripture.
Despite all the glowing words spoken at a funeral, the reality is - the character of a person’s life is determined by the daily choices they make and the behaviour and attitude they exhibit in the bad times as well as good times.
Today is important. Our lives will end sooner than we expect. May the Lord help us to walk closely with Himself and live before fellow believers and the world around us in such a way that people will not have to suppress bad memories at our funeral.